New Website Alert!

I just launched a new website called a blissful interlude.  In addition to some personal musings on finding those blissful moments in life, the site features stories and profiles on folks who are making a difference in the world, however big or small.

The first story is a feature of Andrew Taylor, co-chef and co-owner of the renowned Portland, Maine restaurant, Eventide Oyster Co.

Stay up to date on new posts by subscribing to the website here, like on Facebook, and follow on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.  New features will be posted at least once a week!

Happy reading and stay blissful!

Sarah Woehler

Thoughts Après Paris

You know the feeling before a big event – including a highly anticipated one – of excitement mixed with fear?  Though Paris was The Singular Most Desirable Place to Go on Vacation, I grappled a bit with the excitement/fear feeling leading up to the trip.  And I think it's because, traveling – much like life – is the kind of thing where there are a multitude of unknowns, and that can be a little scary.  You can plan something down to the nanosecond, but there are always curveballs – some good, some bad, some in between – that inevitably happen. 



No caption necessary.

Though there were very few negative curveballs that happened during the trip, the couple quasi-"negative" ones that did occur made it all the more interesting.  Ultimately, it was everything I would have expected Paris to be, and then some.  And I don’t mean that in the Paris is so posh and perfect kind of way (because it totally isn’t), but rather that my visit was full-bodied and life-changing, which I think is the case whenever you experience something first-hand.  In these kind of experiences, perspective grows, changes, and evolves, which is what traveling to new places is really all about.  So, herewith are some of my thoughts and photos après Paris:
 

Cliché as it sounds, the food really is as amazing as they say it is in Paris.  Overwhelmed by all the restaurants there were during the planning process, I left the food planning up to complete spontenaity.  When we landed in Montmartre where our apartment was, however, every restaurant we ate at was a knockout.  From beef bourguignon to banana-and-Nutella-filled crepes, fondue to Vietnamese cuisine (of which Paris is regarded highly for),  French onion soup to croissants and cravette (chocolate pastry), and toasts au saumon fume to cravette, it was all incredible.  None of it was particularly "heart healthy" or "plant based", but partaking it in all was part of the sensorial experience, and I enjoyed every minute of it.
 

French Onion Soup (which I had no less than three times during the trip)

In Paris, nearly everyone smokes, no one wears baseball caps (though I did), and people are partial to black.  For a major city, its people are also rather conservative (not a lot of leg and cleavage) on the street, though TV is a different story.  Also, Italian cuisine is akin to Mexican cuisine in the U.S. - widely prevalent and well done.

Clearly I rebelled against the French aesthetic and dressed for comfort (necessary when you're walking 10+ miles per day).

Versailles was probably as crowded as the Louvre though I wouldn't have known that had I not gone.  It was fun to take the train outside the city and see a bit of French suburbia.  And while walking around the inside of the palace along with hundreds of other tourists left something to be desired, the grounds themselves were quite spectacular.  Personally, however, I much preferred the Palace and Jardin du Luxembourg, which we stumbled upon in St. Germain, taking in an outdoor jazz performance. 

Luxembourg

Everything in Paris is freaking expensive, except for, ironically, bottled water.  Food, clothing, transportation, even deodorant(!) are all substantially more expensive than in the United States.  And, sales tax is a whopping 19.6%.   But, of course, the shopping is also some of the best in the world, so it's hard not to partake, at least a little bit, especially at the city's abundant perfumeries.  Annick Goutal, Fragonard, and the city's numerous pharmacies (which house some of France's best cosmetics) were complete gems. 
 

Rue Chappe (street view from apartment)

Parisians are extremely stingy with napkins.  We went to the same café every single morning for breakfast and along with utensils came one tiny napkin tucked in a basket; likewise, at “restaurantes rapide” (such as at the airport) napkins were nowhere to be found. I’m not sure if people wipe their hands on their clothes, but napkins are far from prevalent. Call me a wasteful American, but I like a little napkin action with my meal. 

Raw Beauty (view of Luxembourg in distance)

Attempting to speak French was actually quite fun.  I didn’t experience any rude Parisians, and in fact, the majority of them were quite friendly, even if some of them weren’t entirely fluent in English themselves. Nonetheless, the phrases “Parlez-vous anglais?”, “Je voudrais . . .” at restaurants, and “Bonjour”, “Merci”, and “Au revoir/Bonsoir” went a long way. 

You can reserve these pods along the Seine to have your very own picnic party.  How cool is that?

Paris has an underbelly, just like everywhere (and everything) else. Case in point being the area surrounding southern Montmartre (also coincidentally home of the Red Light District). Unfortunately, this was our entry into the city and therefore the first we saw of Paris when we arrived.  (For the record, there were no hooker sightings, just some grit and grime similar to a second-world country.)  I wish it had been the last sight instead of the first, because I probably would’ve appreciated it more, but in any event, the City of Lights can’t be all perfume and posh fashions.   

Bakery kitty.  (Note: Not taken in Paris's underbelly.)

Who inspires you?

This Chelsea Fagan chick writes so well I could eat her brain. 

I very recently stumbled upon this blog featuring posts by a suite of different bloggers, and every post that catches my eye just so happens to be written by her.  Not only is she the kind of writer that turns me into a melting pot of envy and admiration, but her subject matter always strikes a chord in me, leaving me with chills and goose bumps and just plain old-fashioned awe. 

Though I'm a bit of a hack compared to someone like her, I hope, as with reading the work of any great writer, that reading her posts makes me a better writer too.  Regardless, though, I know that being subjected to her voice gives me the opportunity to think in a completely new and fresh way about the very same topics that I often think about and grapple with too. 

While I always feel a little envy when discovering someone who is so much better than I am at something, I love how inspired it makes me feel, and how effing lucky, to have discovered some piece of art that enlightens me in such a manner, and more importantly how it makes me a better person on however minute a level. 

How lucky are we to know that we are capable of personal growth at every corner we stumble upon, not only through life's unpredictable challenges but also through the basic appreciation of someone else’s creative work? 

Humble Review: The War of Art

I just read this phenomenal book called The War of Art , which I find myself recommending to anyone I know who has felt any kind of calling (be it mastering capoeira, penning your first novel, name the craft here: ___________). I first heard about it by way of this article I read about my girl crush, Esperanza Spalding . If she was moved by it, I knew I probably would be too.

So, while still in the midst of a certain nameless tome that was well-written but which was losing my interest, I stopped midway and picked up Steven Pressfield’s book. My only regret was that I purchased the Nook version (and while I have surprised myself in enjoying the convenience of an eReader), this is the kind of book I strongly recommend buying in hardcopy format, because if you’re like me, you’re going to want to dog-ear and highlight the bejesus out of it.  (Yes, I'm fully aware that I'm a pathetic sap who loves self-help books.)

While Pressfield’s main craft is novel writing (he has published numerous books, including, among others, The Legend of Bagger Vance), the overall theme of this particular book is to “overcome Resistance” in pursuit of “the unlived life within,” which is applicable to any sort of craft or pursuit. This thing called Resistance rises in the face of any kind of achievement we’re striving toward and it consistently and unabashedly tries to prevent us from working toward these goals. Pressfield says of the evil-force of Resistance, though, that it “is directly proportional to love. If you’re feeling massive Resistance, the good news is, it means there’s tremendous love there too. If you didn’t love the project that is terrifying you, you wouldn’t feel anything. The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s indifference.”

On a personal level, I was particularly struck by one passage where Pressfield talks about experiencing nervousness before embarking on one's craft. This happens to me pretty much every time I sit down to write, and I used to think: What the hell is wrong with me? I’m doing something I love here. Shouldn’t I feel drunken relaxed and swimming in confidence?  (I admire you if you're one of those people who is drunken relaxed and self-confident all the time -- but I can't relate.)  To my surprise, Pressfield says that such jitters are actually a good thing and that these feelings are normal. He writes:

                   The counterfeit innovator is wildly self-confident. The real one is   

                   scared to death. . . . The more scared we are of a work or calling,  

                   the more sure we can be that we have to do it. . . . Fear doesn’t go

                   away.

                  The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which

                 dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day. . . . The more

                 you love your art/calling/enterprise, the more important its

                 accomplishment to the evolution of your soul, the more you will fear it

                 and the more Resistance you will experience facing it.

Now I no longer feel like such a freak. These feelings are normal, and they are clearly not a bad thing. When we’re participating in something we love so passionately, it can feel overwhelming and nervewracking, although hopefully not so much that it is paralyzing. Admittedly, as a Type A perfectionist, the pressure I feel to make things just so the first time around can sometimes paralyze me a bit.  While this is something I acknowledge and am continually working on, what I've learned is that with creative pursuits, in particular, the attainment of “perfection” can be better achieved through consistency, which is why you'll see that some of my blog posts seriously flawed and riddled with typos and misquotes. After all, being 110% is not what creativity is all about, right?

Another interesting aspect about Pressfield's approach to the craft is his emphasis on the importance of spirituality in relation to the craft.  Though he is not necessarily a religious man, he openly admits that he is a spiritual one, and writes about the necessity in calling upon such spiritual forces when embarking on your craft. I found this intriguing, because, while I don't "call upon spiritual forces" before I sit down to write, I have always believed that creative endeavors were synergistically spiritual. Spirituality is broad and open-ended, in that sense.

To get to the root of self, beyond the ego is, in essence a spiritual pursuit. Personally, I feel a sense of spiritual enlightenment when I’m writing, or practicing yoga, or taking a walk through the woods. In his book, Pressfield explains that in order to get beyond the ego and to the self, a recognition of – although not dwelling on – spiritual forces is important. Whether you are spiritual or not, I thought this was a point worth contemplating.

If you are like me, who simply likes to be inspired and to be given the opportunity to look at things from a different perspective, this short, 166-pager is more than worth a read.  And I would even venture to say -- corny as it sounds -- that the book might even be a life-changer. 

Image: Pinterest

All In The Ritual

I’ve been thinking about rituals lately – the things we do to relax, to center ourselves, or to be reminded that life has a deeper purpose beyond the mundane goings-on of everyday life. Rituals can be anything as simple as washing your face with a particular facewash every morning or practicing yoga after work or something more indulgent such as getting a pedicure or a massage on a weekly basis. Whatever it is, having rituals reminds us to slow down and reflect, allowing us to recharge so that we have the energy to engage more fully in life, whether in our careers, our studies, or our creative pursuits.

I have practiced the same rituals for a while now – listening to music, drinking tea, exercising, and having solo time. I am lucky that I can share a few of these rituals with my husband, but probably my favorite ritual is that of being alone, such as in the comfort of my own space in my study where I have a nice set of speakers and a subwoofer to blast music from.  (If you're going to take listening music to the ritual level sound quality is important.) There I sit in my stuffed chair, sipping tea (another ritual that I enjoy during this time), leafing through magazines, writing, and/or just daydreaming.  Most importantly, my ritual is experienced by simply being in the moment.  Sometimes I’ll do this for 15 minutes; other times I do this for an hour or more. I always know when I’ve had enough, which is marked by that feeling of replenishment and a desire to re-enter the world.  This is when I know that my ritual is working.

While the technical definition of ritual is a "religious or solemn ceremony consisting of a series of actions performed according to a prescribed order" (Dictionary.com), I believe the key to practicing rituals is that they be whatever it is you feel like doing, rather than something you feel you should be doing, practiced in a manner that feels almost spiritual or meditative. Sure, my ritual of sitting by myself and listening to music and drinking tea may sound boring and a complete waste of time to some, but to me it’s always the perfect remedy when I’m feeling overworked, overtired, cranky, or uninspired. A little soul time always makes me feel like I’ve regained a part of me that has gotten lost in the shuffle during the day or after a long week.

I watched a great documentary last week called All In This Tea, which, in addition to following an American man in China in pursuit of the finest teas, showcases the ritual of tea drinking, which is what got me on the subject of thinking about this ritual thing. In China, tea drinking is all about the experience of the act itself and relaxing, not letting other distractions get in the way. Whether it’s drinking tea or washing the dishes (whatever it is that you identify with) the notion of being present in the moment is the essence of what participating in  ritual pursuits is all about.

Nude v. Naked

I didn’t watch the MTV Movie Awards on Sunday night, but I wished I had, #1, because Jason Sudeikis was hosting (seriously – how can you not have a crush on the guy?) and #2, because of Reese Witherspoon’s acceptance speech in which she said:

                      

I know it's cool to be bad, I get it ... but it's also possible to make it in Hollywood without a reality show.  When I came up in this business, you made a sex tape and you were embarrassed and hid it under your bed and like if you took naked pictures of yourself on your cell phone, you hide your face!

For those of you living under a rock, and haven’t heard about or seen actress Blake Lively’s nude photos, this was clearly in response to that, as well as to the reality TV darlings – the Kim Kardashians and Paris Hiltons that we love to hate but can’t seem to get enough of. (This is what the media does to us, friends.)

Anyway, watching the clip of Reese’s speech made me reflect on the theme of women dumbing themselves down or slutting themselves up in an effort to try to be noticed or recognized – on the major scale to become famous or on a minor scale to get attention from the opposite sex. This is not a feminist issue, might I add, but a self-valuing issue. Why should anyone feel the need to reduce one’s self to just a naked body? Granted, it’s the oldest trick in the book, although if you think about it, everyone’s got a little T&A . . .

But it’s what you do with that T&A that counts. A little T&A used in the right place at the right time, as an accompaniment to smart and interesting, is undoubtedly sexy, the opposite of slutty, the opposite of naked. (Well, at least I think so. Some feminists may disagree.) T&A used at the wrong time, on the other hand, in the wrong place, without any provision of talent or smarts, is just boring. It is. 

For full disclosure, I admit I did take a peek at Blake Lively’s pics, and she looked like any girl with a good body. I’m not sure why I was surprised by this – maybe because she’s a celebrity – but it nonetheless made me recall this thing I learned in Art History class my freshman year in college, that is the notion of Nude v. Naked. Nude is sexy and intentional; it’s art. Naked, on the other hand, is self-conscious and exposed; barren. In a sense, Naked represents the Paris Hiltons and the Kim Kardashians of our society. (I leave Blake Lively off the list because she is a girl with some redeemable value who cheapened herself by making a really dumb mistake – there’s still hope for her.) But as for the Parises and Kims, they may not always be naked, but for now that’s what they are – caught in that strange place in society, where they are both a source of entertainment for their shameless exposedness and a laughing stock, for their lack of demonstrable talent and foolish plugs for every product possible.

I’m glad Reese Witherspoon spoke her mind on Sunday night, because it’s sound bites like that which resonate to a society which isn’t always willing to confront the rippling effect of a little T&A at the wrong time and place.

Wanna be creative? Just pencil it in.

I think creativity is important.  Actually, I think creativity is vital.  But sometimes it is hard to find the time and the energy to be creative.  It is easier just to go through the motions of work and routine and to just let our creative dreams go by the wayside.  Tomorrow, I often say.  Next week.  When I have the energy, when I'm on vacation, when I win the lottery.  But the reality is that if we constantly have these excuses we will never pursue our creativity, and the dreams that we say are what's most important to us -- playing the piano, drawing, sculpting, writing, what have you, will go by the wayside.  Life is too short to not be doing the things that make us the most happy, don't you agree?

While I was on the treadmill this morning (I would've preferred to have walked outside but it's an unbelievably hot one today in Maine), I came upon a great little blurb on creativity in Whole Living magazine.  In it, Eric Maisel, Ph.D., provides three steps to creativity, which he says to achieve by doing the following:

1. Start be making a separate piece space where you can get your creative work done. 
2. Make sure you schedule the time so it becomes a real item on your schedule -- show up and be consistent.  Finally, enjoy the progression. 
3. Take mistakes and messes in stride -- the ups and downs are part of the process. 

I was so taken by this that I cut it out and posted on my fridge as a daily reminder to pencil in my creative time.  Many times I think of being creative as a luxury, as an indulgence that can only be partaken in once all my work and chores are complete.  To be honest -- I'm freaking sick of that attitude.  Maisel's advice is helpful because the only way to make sure it actually happens is to simply schedule it in and to just take it in stride, knowing that being creative is all about experimentation and exploration.  Now that's some advice I can get on board with.